Tuesday, May 31, 2011


Readers beware, things are about to get graphic.

I'm trying to take this pregnancy thing in stride. I realize there is a learning curve but have mercy, things have quickly taken an awkward turn. I have unidentifiable alien parts moving around in my belly at all times. I no longer enjoy going to bed at night because it just means I'll have to get up to pee at least four times and have just as many pillows to help support my widening parts. I fear stairs. Frankly, they just piss me off because I have to usually stop halfway up the flight to catch my breath and steady my feet. My wardrobe is limited to about five total ensembles, none of which are mine (God bless Sara). I'm currently still wearing my own skeevies but it's about time to buy me some big girl underwear. Then there's the heartburn. I was surprised when I hadn't been experiencing any because I'm a chronic sufferer when not carrying Cletus so naturally I thought things would at least continue as is or if not get worse. However, I was sailing through. Sailing like Bill Murry in What About Bob. Then all of a sudden, bam! Someone lit a blow torch to my chest and throat and now I covet Tums like crystal meth candy. That coupled with the nice cold and cough I have right now and I want nothing more then to eat ice cream all day just so I can down the hatch with something cold. None of these are so called "minor" offenses in my eyes, but none, absolutely none, compare to the debacle I experienced yesterday.

Yesterday, I peed my pants. Literally. I knew I had to go because I always have to go. I pee like 634 times a day. I can finish going to the bathroom, stand up and instantly feel like I have to go again. It's that chronic in this my 32nd week of pregnancy. I say all this because I should've known better. I felt the urge and apparently ignored it out of rebellion, spite or just plain laziness. I was doing fine, I was surviving, and then... I sneezed. Holy hoo ha - I lost all control. By the time I realized what had happened, I was feeling a trickle down my leg and sprinting to the bathroom. I was immediately mortified but quickly came to laugh at the situation and as soon as I had changed my soiled pants, I ran to tell Shawn. Because that's the kinda marriage we have...

I had heard this was a prego problem but assumed it wouldn't happen to me until after the wee one was born. What fun finding out how wrong I was. What an astonishing revelation it was to actually lose control of a part of my body. If only those Pampers I had weren't newborn size...

Thursday, May 26, 2011


I like to call this the Great Team DeBoer DeBate: keep fixing what continues to ale our two beautiful beasts because we own them and therefore they are payment-free, or ditch them for something a bit newer, a bit more reliable and ultimately, a bit more expensive.

Exhibit A: We have a 1994 Chevy Beretta, teal, 2-door with 190,000ish miles. It's completely paid for, has brand spanking new seat covers, newish tires, we know what's been fixed and by whom and who's been driving and taking care of it. We carry liability-only insurance to the total of $381.40/year. That coupled with the yearly registration and tab fees of $41.25, equates to this bitch costing us about $35.22/month. The gas mileage is no where near what is should be because a) I drive 4.75 miles to work, in town and b) it doesn't run so well. The check engine light goes on and off daily. The breaks chug at every stop. The power locks and windows still work but make a monotonous clicking noise continuously from the time you open the door until the time you get in and close the door behind you. Doesn't sound like a big deal but when you're 31 weeks pregnant it takes a while to get in and out of a car of this nature and that incessant clicking is about enough to make my raging hormones flair and my large left thigh raise to kung-fu kick out a window. Also, the A/C doesn't work, it's a 2-door and therefore will not work for Cletus and the car just makes a lovely hissing, clanking, rough noise when it runs. Did I mention it's paid for?

Exhibit B: We have a 1994 Chevy Cavalier, green (painted by Dad), 2-door with 218,000ish miles. It's also completely paid for, sports a bad ass camo seat cover on the driver's side and a camo wheel cover as well. It was completely hauled over by Dad and thanks to his attention to detail, I have a written record of everything that was fixed, every part that was replaced, when, at what cost and by what manufacturer. I also have a record of every place he ever put in gas and therefore what the gas mileage has been since he owned it. Needless to say it's been steadily falling since we took it over. We also carry liability-only insurance on this beast (when we drive it) but thanks to the brakes going out recently, it's without said insurance and instead just does it's job decorating our front lawn. We just renewed the registration in April for $41.25 as well, which I had a feeling was going to jinx things. All-in-all, it basically costs the same as the Beretta. It does not have power locks or windows and also does not have A/C. It too is a 2-door and therefore will not accommodate Cletus, oh, and the power steering is slowly going out. We've been piddling through with some power steering fluid for a while now but it was a rough, rough winter. Some days I worked my Hee Man arms so much turning a corner I thought my biceps were going to rip open my sleeves. Due to this ailment, the car makes a lovely hissing, high pitched squeal that gets worse when you turn. I can't help it, this one holds a little sentimental value though.

The Cavalier is currently out of rotation because we were recently quoted a little over $700 worth in brake repairs. I was driving home one day and had them held at a red light when they gave way and sank all the way to the floor while the car crept ever so slightly forward. From there it was a bit of an adventurous ride home but I made it and they still "worked" well enough to do the job at the few stop signs I had left until Ruggles.

This quote is what ultimately reignited the debate to which I again instinctively said no, we are not buying anything new, these still run just fine. However rash this argument was at the time, I'm now starting to waver. We can't afford something new so it would have to be used and therefore we would be giving up used cars for another used car. We wouldn't know it's history but it would have much fewer miles, would be more reliable and would be a 4-door or SUV that would accommodate both Cletus and the pooches. It may sound like a no-brainer but I can't help but hear my Dad's voice saying "…fixing these once is much cheaper then a car payment for the next three to five years plus you'll be paying more in registration, tabs and insurance…". He was a very wise financial man so his advice does carry some validity.

But are they practical anymore? Are they reliable? Are they efficient? Do they accommodate our growing family? How long until the next fix and then the next? What will have to happen before we say enough is enough? Obviously I'm still undecided and there are a few other factors I haven't mentioned that are still panning out but this is why I'm turning to you. What would you do?

Monday, May 23, 2011


And the winner of the first Team DeBoer Challenge is… thanks to random.org… and no I didn't rig anything so this is totally on the honesty up and up… Mr. H!

His comment was as follows:
Mr. H said... Reward... Hmm... How about you come visit CF!!!

Well, we will be in the great southern state of Iowa the weekend of June 4th for a wedding reception so maybe we could arrange a visit. If not, I know the perfect backup gift. Something valued at $10. Something from March. Something that's long overdue. *wink, wink*

On a serious note, a very, very sincere thank you to everyone who became a follower, recruited other followers, obliged my silly selfishness and helped me reach my goal of 50 followers! I hope the number continues to climb but in order for that to happen, I may need to be a wee bit more consistent posting. Along those lines, expect much to come. Much more then just Cletus news and updates… Team DeBoer news and updates and even scarier, opinions, randomness and just good ole fashioned cynicism. Feel free to continue to comment; I love reading your thoughts about my thoughts about others thoughts. It's unnecessary banter that keeps life interesting…

By the way, purely random, has anyone read any good books lately? Or more specifically, has anyone read Daughters of the Revolution? I stumbled upon the title and synopsis the other day while I was perusing the O magazine and waiting for my painting to be finished framing at Michaels. It sounded so good I made up a little diddy in my head so I would remember the title. Stupid prego brain anyway.

Sunday, May 22, 2011


That's the number of years I've been legally wed to this handsome devil.

It stormed the day we were married and fittingly, it stormed yesterday on our anniversary. Rain is supposed to be good luck so I think we're set. We spent the day with our butts firmly planted in movie theatre seats catching up on one of our favorite past times: watching movies whilst enjoying snuck-in goodies and each others company. When we got home, we took a leisurely nap and finished the night off watching the Twins. It was a perfect day.

Mr. DeBoer continues to impress, attract and slay me. There is never a dull day at Team DeBoer's house and yes, he really is like that all the time. God love him for it… I know I do.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011


Tomorrow will officially mark week 30 for Team DeBoer. In anticipation of the big day, here's how things have progressed… brace yourself, things are about to get big.

Week 25 – Obviously.

Week 26 – Where'd my feet go?
Week 26 Outtake – Because sometimes it's not all rainbows, unicorns and lollipops.
Week 27 – I can't look.

Week 28 – Go to sleep… go to sleep… go to sleeeeep crazy Cletus!

Week 28 Outtake – Shawn's shirt… brings out my double chin apparently.

Week 29 – Timer's about ready to pop.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011


I promise I will be blogging soon. I promise I will announce a winner to my April follower challenge. I promise to post more pics of Cletus' humble abode among other things. I promise to be more consistent. If I could, just, get, through, this week…

I know, I know. I beg and plead and whine for people to follow my blog and then I fall off the face of the earth. Nice, eh? I assure you, more is to come…


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